The Greatest Showman

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Tessa only felt uncomfortably tight in her chest, either the heart-piercing pain, or the stuffy, as if she couldn't breathe. She lowered her head and took a deep breath, and then out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sitting William, on the left, burst into tears.

William just sat there quietly, with a smile on the corner of his mouth, but the tears continued to fall down like broken pearls. Let the tears fall silently. Tessa's nose suddenly became sour, and the tightness in her chest made her stomach roll for a while, and she almost vomited.

Death is more real than ever. When life really comes to an end, it is not the earth-shattering and vigorous as described in the movies or novels, but more of a quiet, like autumn leaves falling, silent, but it outlines desolation and loneliness little by little.

He raised his head again, looked at Adam calmly, and stated to Catherine how normal death is, because "everyone dies, it's just a different time".

Pale lips, no blood at all; sunken eyes, thick dark circles mixed with a trace of blood; haggard cheeks, no trace of luster; only those eyes, those dark brown eyes, The dim light is still flowing, and a touch of sadness and helplessness is surging. As he spoke, his eyes turned red, and the thin mist of water had not even had time to condense, so he blinked his eyes, hiding the trace of fragility, leaving only those quiet and sad eyes that seemed to stop the water. A bright moon in the middle shatters when touched.

Tessa's heart clenched like this, as if a big hand was grabbing the heart fiercely, with force and force.

Chemotherapy didn't work, and surgery was the only way, but because of the larger-than-expected size of the tumor, the risks of surgery were difficult to predict. This is not a "50/50" problem, there is no chance of success, it's just a gamble. Even the attending physicians were unable to make any assessments until the operation was over.

So, this is the end, this is the fork in death.

Anger finally dominated Adam's brain. He blamed Katherine for being unhelpful, he blamed his mother for being over-controlling, he blamed Kyle for being selfish, he blamed the damn cancer that ruined his entire life. He was like a madman, driving the car on the road rampant and risking his life; he was like a lunatic, he drove Kyle out of the passenger seat, banged the steering wheel frantically, and vented his inner anger recklessly.

"Ah..." Adam grabbed the steering wheel with both hands and shouted loudly, as if the last brilliance and splendor of life were blooming, the tearing voice was so angry, so helpless, so painful.

Tessa covered her mouth tightly, the hot tears blurred her vision, she lowered her head in embarrassment, wiped away the tears quickly, but burned the back of her hand, and then Tessa saw William's shoulders shrugging gently, he Gritting his teeth tightly, his entire face was tense to the extreme, tears continued to fall down, and the slightly white lips due to too much force revealed his fragility at the moment.

Any language is pale at this moment. Because, in the face of death, any justification, any description, any action is so insignificant. He is so young, he is so healthy, he is so sunny, he is so energetic, he is so kind, and he is so sincere... There are too many ugly things in this world, but in real life, It's always the good ones that bear the heartbreak and despair.

Just thinking of this, Tessa felt that she couldn't hold it any longer, and her tears burst.

After the catharsis, Adam finally calmed down and set his life back to the original track bit by bit: he prepared food for the dog, he sorted out the cabinets that had not been cleaned for a long time, he cleaned up The chaos in the bathroom, he threw away the garbage in the kitchen, he changed the sheets and bedspreads for the room again... Finally, at midnight, he left the house, along the familiar street, measuring his life with his feet bit by bit.

This is a farewell. Maybe it's saying goodbye to the past life and embracing a new future; maybe it's saying goodbye to oneself, saying goodbye to all kinds of life, and falling asleep forever. Finally, looking at himself in the bathroom mirror, with a bald head, haggard, dark circles, and a bloodless face, there is a faint light in the depths of the eyes, which seems to disappear at any time, but it is always bright.

Turn off the lights and go to sleep. Good night.

It was such a calm picture, and it was such trivial details, that it shattered all of Tessa's defenses. Seeing Adam's every move, so real, yet so unreal, she couldn't help crying. The light in the depths of those eyes, she just wanted to firmly grasp, grasp, grasp.

50% chance, what does that mean?

Sitting on the bed/, the doctors explained the precautions and asked Adam to sign the relevant documents, and then began the preoperative preparation. With his father and mother by his side, the father walked up with a smile on his face, patted Adam on the shoulder, and showed off cautiously, "I have a new coat."

"Really?" Adam closed his jaw with a smile and listened carefully.

"The Brooks Brothers." The father said more and more happily, like a child, "The pocket is silk, you can touch it!" Adam really reached into the pocket and touched the lining, "How does it feel? ?"

"Very good." Adam smiled brightly, nodded in approval, then pulled out his hand and patted his father lightly on the shoulder, "Listen, I know it's a little difficult for you to keep up with the current situation. , but I just want you to know that I love you a lot.

"Adam looked at his father with such a smile and firmness, the light in his eyes gradually became brighter, and the curvature of the corners of his mouth was so beautiful.

Father looked at Adam, suddenly stunned, the smile disappeared a little bit, and his eyes blushed inexplicably, "Okay." His voice choked up like this. But he still didn't know what was going on. He looked blank and confused, looked up at his wife, and cast his eyes for help.

It was such a small action that Adam's voice choked up. The anesthesiologist came to give anesthesia, "Please relax, I will inject the anesthetic into your infusion tube, it will take a while for the effect of the medicine to start to work."

"You...Are you going to start now?" Adam asked in a panic. The nurse began to invite the parents to wait in the waiting room, but Adam couldn't help but continue to ask, "How long will the medicine last?"

"It varies from person to person," says the anesthesiologist.

"Yes." Adam nodded, "but, but how do you know that the medicine is long enough to not wake me up during the operation; how do you know that the medicine is not too long to wake me up forever? Come." After speaking, Adam stopped, his eyes were shaking violently, he couldn't help but start asking for help, "Mom?"

Mother hurriedly leaned up and hugged Adam, "Baby, you will be fine." Holding tightly, tears fell, she quickly raised her hand to wipe away, and must not let Adam see.

Adam clenched his teeth and tried his best to suppress and control him, but tears still filled his eyes, and the blankness, helplessness, and fear in his sight rippled gently like ripples, so small, yet so grand, so Calm, yet so turbulent. This was the first time Adam shed tears, the first time since his cancer diagnosis.

Tessa finally couldn't bear it any longer and covered her mouth with her hands, but she still fell apart completely. Not because of fear, but because of life. Life is so great, yet so fragile, life is so beautiful, yet so pale. At this moment, she finally understood the meaning of Renly's words before the film screening:

Movies are important, but there are many things in life that are more important than movies.

Thinking of tonight's accident, of Renly's anger when confronted by reporters, of the moment of silence before Renly spoke. Tessa burst into tears, watching Adam being slowly pushed into the operating room, watching her parents sit blankly in the waiting room, watching Kyle standing alone outside smoking a cigarette, watching. With Katherine absent at the center of the conversation...the tears couldn't stop.

Not just Tessa, not just Hope and William. The entire auditorium was silent, silent and sad, the sound of wiping tears and the beating of the heart could be vaguely heard. At this moment, at this moment tonight, "Anti-Cancer" I've become so special, so wonderful, and so heavy. Stripped of the excitement of the premiere, stripped of the entertainment of the film, the commonality of art and life has become more real than ever.

After five hours of waiting, the operation was finally over. The doctor said a lot of technical terms, which were incomprehensible, which made people wonder if it was in English, and finally said something that everyone could understand.” ...but, he'll be fine." A long sigh of relief could be heard throughout the room, especially when Kyle groaned, "You should have said that in the first place, okay?" The audience The group laughed.

Tessa couldn't help but smile. Afterwards, the movie entered the comedy mode again. After the operation, Adam, who still had no effect of the anesthesia, was like a child, talking vaguely all kinds of nonsense. I've seen it, Tessa laughed so hard that her cheeks hurt a little.

After being discharged from the hospital, he returned to Adam's apartment. Kyle changed his dressings himself. The two live treasures bickered for a while. The audience in the movie theater laughed until they had no friends. After the treatment, Adam stood in front of the mirror and looked at himself up and down. I couldn't help laughing, "This is crazy, I look handsome."

"I miss you." Kyle said with a smile, which made the audience clapped and laughed together, and Tessa and Hope even burst into laughter, tears and snot running wildly on their cheeks, laughing The sound couldn't stop at all, maybe because the burden really made the joke, maybe because of the happiness and joy of escaping from death, but it doesn't matter which reason, the important thing is that at this moment, they are happy.

Adam too, because he has a date tonight, with Katherine.

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